1970 Mustang Mach I "Synergy Green Pearl"351 Cleveland - Fuel Injection "The Rattle Shaker" Complete nut and bolt rotisserie restoration LESS than 500 miles by C.A.R.S. The letter implies that the only protection used was the birth control. I love your snark this morning!! It is due to his own stupidity if he thought that a single sexual encounter could not produce a child, that birth control pills would definitely prevent him from impregnating someone or that he could legally opt out if a pregnancy occurred. So, in other words, RR, it is a noble thing to give your child to strangers in the hope that he or she is treated well (that the adoptive parents wont abuse them, wont get divorced in a messy way, wont let them fend for themselves, and so on), even though youll have no interaction with that child again, but it is base and vile to have the same lack of interaction but to provide financial support which doesnt in any way affect the mothers ability to find a partner that is right for her. because, no one can give you a 100% guarantee that none of that will happen. Or could CG be right, and this is all a hoax? April 10, 2012, 12:00 am. As Ive said upthread: a man who sleeps with a woman he believes to be on the pill does so with the not-unreasonable expectation that she doesnt want to become pregnant. Heh, are you suuuuure you still want to be a professional therapist? Id be more concerned with him having unprotected sex with someone HE just met. But I guess I looked at it a lot like a woman adopting a baby alone would. April 10, 2012, 6:23 pm, P.S. No. SpaceySteph But she can also at any time change her mind and he has no recourse. BACKFIRES! This is about a pregnancy thats two weeks in. It may be more than a coincidence that your girlfriend or wife announced she was pregnant right after you broke up with her. Personally, I think they should be given a one-time option to opt-out if the woman wants to keep the child and the man doesnt. The child support goes to support the child. I wont go into the reasons they came to this, (very long, and quite personal, story), but its entirely possible that if a women gets pregnant and decides to keep the baby though the father would prefer she abort, he DOES have the option to waive his parental rights and duties to the child and thus not be legally responsible for child support. Im a guy, and I think that the BF is a loser scum bag. But, seriously you should both get tested for STDs. He should get a damn vasectomy. Dont care to be properly identified? Well, now it's been years. He wont be a deadbeat dad, as some have suggested. Its Gone Downhill. If you were thinking about breaking up with herthe pregnancy might be a trap. Commenters on most websites just depress me I dont bother reading them anymore. Or pining away for a father figure theyll never, ever have? The way you talk, I gotta believe youre one of those disgusting pro-lifers who are always trying to control people. He said he still loves me and that he didnt love her, and it was a mistake. The states dont advertise this. And while not using a condom might not be the end all be all of crazy mistakes, he should have known better. Youre only asking for heartache down the road. It was a vague post on my part Made even more confusing by the fact that _jsw_ was posting at roughly the same time and then his posted first. 6napkinburger Take this as a lesson learned. And you wonder why people accuse the threads of being hostile toward males? Men AND women both have decided, well after-the-fact, that no babies is better than having babies. But I agree no one should tell anyone what they can and cant do with their own bodies. I wouldnt want to hang around to find out. April 10, 2012, 7:06 pm. If the woman is not required to support a child He wants nothing to do with his own child. We still cant quite manage partheogenesis or budding. Here's Why Your Ex Keeps Texting You After The Breakup And is this letter for real? I dont feel like his decision to not be involved in his biological childs life makes him an immature asshole. if she has a miscarriage because he's back with you, your fault. I think Dan Savage an Santorum have some sexual tension though. lets_be_honest I think hes scum because hes furious with the girl he impregnated. Might he have continued sleeping with her? Why he would be furious with anyone other than himself is beyond me. And oxygen. Wow RR, I like it when you get angry. P.S. I simply had to chime in here as this is what I do for a living and so many people are sadly misinformed. April 12, 2012, 2:47 am. John Rohan Like if the guy is unconscious or doesnt know how babies are made? However, if a woman has sex with a man, she can make all the choices and decisions, force palimony, and essentially treat that man as their financial slave for the next 18 years. Thats seriously not cool. It doesnt have to toss a ball with you to help with your rehab or take pictures of you with your new arm. Let him go. April 9, 2012, 2:44 pm. he delivers the baby from the nursery to your house. Makes me wonder if youre happily married like I am, or just a bitter divorcee who clings to feminism and man-hating as a knee jerk reaction of having been wronged. Hes an idiot either way. Wanting nothing to do with his child, which like it or not seems to be coming, is not acceptable- and a mature girlfriend would help him to see that these are the cards hes been dealt, and that he now has to work with them. And the internet is this perfect little anonymous bubble for people to shoot off their anger. She got pregnant. AndreaMarie Hey Bossip Fam, what do you think? I think what you are forgetting in all of this is that a child is not a peanut. Putting that opinion into action with either government or private coercion is that to which we have no right. WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM, LW? He has to fit the baby into their life, not the other way around. So, he feels it is best to make things work with her for the sake of his baby. End of story. Their choice, honey. April 9, 2012, 11:40 am. i am currently in an awful situation. So, ask yourself why do you allow it? I find it absurd that there is a debate about this guys right to have unprotected sex as if its ever a good idea. He found her annoying but still slept with herI think this was pretty assholish behavior. Steve Kellmeyer I have a really hard time believing that this guy who hates this woman and wants nothing to do with this child had a civil conversation with the baby mom discussing their options, while stating his preference for an abortion. lets_be_honest Deal with it, ladies. April 11, 2012, 2:00 am, John Rohan I wouldnt be single again for all the tea in china. Seriously. It seems like you would be even more concerned about this when sleeping with someone you are non-monogamous with. Addie Pray Im sure youll do a wonderful job! If the baby mama wants to keep the baby, its her decision. the thing is, he has a 4 yr old daughter. Hes made a choice. Thats true, but by the same token, wait a bit (a few days or at least a full conversation) to see if you can get along with someone on a basic level before jumping into bed with them. You add nothing to the conversation but name-calling. We all know breakups are painful. Consider that this is the kind of guy that has casual sex with people he doesnt really know/like while on break from a relationship with someone he cant live without. Come on, though Three times? Are you sure you are not living in a cheap novel? reader, yelyah77+, writes (16 April 2009): A iseeshiny yes he doesnt seem like much a catch, but to say he exposed her to STDs! is a stretch. Malarky. We need to rebuild our trust, but I cant trust the situation because he cheated on me with her. Chuck Pelto No law can change the fact that whatever choice a man or woman in this position makes, the woman has the burden of actually carrying out the birth or abortion. Its interesting how none of these comments address that he SPECIFICALLY said that he would have nothing to do with his own child. Been there Yes? bittergaymark If a woman wanted to choose to terminate the child, would she be less of a real woman for not stepping up to the responsibility? He sounds like bad news. Or you think that landygirl does that? If you cant handle the idea that this could happen, then wrap it up, or dont have casual sex. We only have sex if were ready to be a father? But I think shes tried to trap him and hes untrappable.. First of all, she seems to think her boyfriends reaction is completely reasonable. Government will go after him for either Medical Support and/or Child Support. Sex makes babies and every time you have sex you run the risk of making a baby. I think that the thing to keep in mind is that the angry ranters are really just a very vocal minority. Yes everyone went bonkers. [The feminist movement died one millisecond after the first impact. ColorsOfTheWind April 10, 2012, 5:07 pm. April 9, 2012, 11:23 am. I would love, just ONCE on this site, for one of the male commenters to address shitty man behavior. female This attitude that men become slaves the instant a girl gets pregnant is actually very crazy, in my opinion. And he shouldnt, either. What are your thoughts on an abortion? Im not a woman hater happily married for 15 years, and I love my mother, my sister and even my mother-in-law. More like: her: what do you want to do about it? Year 1970. Why he is scum but a woman who opts for an abortion or adoption isnt its beyond me. She came first. List of Everybody Hates Chris characters - Wikipedia If that means not being with your boyfriend for the next 9 months to a year, then so be it (I dont think youll die without him). Ok, so this dude: Male rape victims notwithstanding, men control where their sperm goes. But for someone more causal, that isnt really there as much. And throwing money at her only covers one part of that. Come on! He chose not to take the steps to avoid making a baby, and to avoid putting himself (and you!) I dont usually ever think letters are fake, but this one MIGHT be fake. I think that is a pretty bad guess with how this guys attitude is towards things, and how badley he wants nothing to do with the child. She says the girl says she got pregnant while on birth control, puh leaaaaaaaaaase. The point you bring up here is why I cant wrap my head around one night stands. If the other woman decides to have the baby, her now boyfriend will be liable for child support, which will significantly impact his finances (and their finances if they marry for the next 18 years. Babies come from the hospital. His? April 10, 2012, 6:26 pm. And he wants absolutely nothing to do with that baby? But everyday it breaks my heart knowing I'm not going to be the top priority. Both have to accept responsibility for that. A pregnancy, especially an unplanned one with no real relationship behind it is not a reason to stay together. LOL What? Life isnt fair. Some people are correct that the LWs anger is displaced. entertaining for sure, but dont be so surprised when people call you out on it a la Landygirl. Iwannatalktosampson Life is unfair. I feel like a part of me has died . Freeze your sperm and get a vasectomy. April 10, 2012, 5:06 am, Still, itd be nice if so many women werent so often so shamelessly dishonest about this, wouldnt it? April 12, 2012, 2:41 am. But condoms should still be used unless the relationship is established and monogamous and both parties are disease-free. female I came back to re-read because I was worried my reply would be disjointed and confusing (I wrote it tired last night, with a fever), so Im glad that while its not going to win any literary award, it wasnt totally nonsensical! Secondly, it is a medical procedure. I could understand that he would be shocked and unhappy, but who does that? Ask Dr. Sherry: 'My Fianc Got Another Woman Pregnant, Now - Essence Its a double standard. That is called deception. I think its dispicable that you would consider re-uniting with a man that thinks his only obligation as a father is financial support. Both of their attitudes kind of suck. He was able to find someone else to keep him company. . Is it the fact that he wants something different from what she does that makes him scum? Whose idea was it to take a break anyway? Fine, Ill support you in raising the child, but Im not prepared to be a dad. Yes, it is the less than desirable course to take but he is, in a way, owning up to his responsibility (monetarily).